How to Overcome the Evil Aimed at You, Part 1

Well, as we get started, I want to ask you to go to a place that you may not really want to go, but I’ll tell you in advance it’ll be worth it. I’d like you to lean back just a little bit, be reflective, and I want you to answer this question in your mind. Feel free to even close your eyes for just a moment if it’s helpful.

Of all the people in your life to date that you would say have hurt you the most, who comes to your mind? Who has wounded you? Who sexually or physically abused you when you were younger? Who has been ungrateful and humiliated you? Who has betrayed you?

Have you got it? I want you to follow along, and I want to read to you what I think are the most radical words that have ever come out of any person’s mouth that has walked on the earth. They’re familiar to some of you, which is unfortunate because they lose their power.

Matthew chapter 5 in the Sermon on the Mount. “You have heard it said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy,’ but I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” What’s it look like practically to love your enemies?

Open your Bibles, if you will, to Romans chapter 12. He begins to clearly tell us how to respond to the evil aimed at us in verse 14. In verses 14 to 16, he’s going to give us a positive command. This is how you respond to that person that came to your mind that I started this message with and asked you to think about. And he’s going to say, Here’s how you respond to that person. Now, I’m going to warn you, it’s going to sound ridiculous and impossible.

“Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; and mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud; but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.”

He’s going to say you need to bless them, and that’s how. Then he gives a negative command. The temptation when our enemies and people who’ve hurt us – there’s a temptation. And he’s going to hit it right between our eyes. Verse 17. “Do not repay evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live,” or, “be at peace with all men. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it’s written: ‘It is mine to avenge. I will repay’, says the Lord.”

On the contrary. Here’s how you’re to treat that person that is in your mind. “If your enemy’s hungry, feed him. If she’s thirsty, give her a drink. In so doing, you will heap burning coals upon their head.” And that doesn’t mean God will blow their brains out. We’ll learn in a little bit what that really means.

And then there’s this supernatural result. There’s this thing that when you act the way Jesus acted toward His enemies – because Jesus lives in you by His Spirit – and you do it in the power of His Word and authentic community, he says, “Do not be overcome by evil.” And it’s an evil world. But he says there’s something more powerful than evil. “Overcome evil with good.”

Now what I want to do in the remainder of our time is I want to break down very specifically and practically what it looks like to bless those who persecute you. That’s the first and positive command. And the command is this: “Bless them that persecute you.” That’s what you’re called to do. In verses 14, 15, and 16, He’s going to give you three specific ways to bless them.

The word bless, by the way – this is not like someone sneezes, and you go, “Oh, bless you.” This is not that, okay? This word literally means to desire the salvation of another person. It means to desire and long for God’s blessing and favor to be upon them. It’s like for that enemy, that actually their life would work out well. That if they’re married, their marriage would get deeper. If they’re a parent, their kids would do well. If they have a job, they would…It’s blessing. That’s what you’re praying.

And there are three components here. The first component of blessing others is forgiving them. This is hard. Forgiving them. If you’re to pray for and blessing is for their salvation, if you want God to forgive them, guess what. You’ve got to forgive them. And you know that little section in, we call it the Lord’s Prayer? “Forgive us our sins just as we forgive others.”

See, the premise is going to be, and this is the key to loving your enemies, you and I have to come to the point where we really grasp how merciful, and God has not given us what we deserve. And there’s part of it where it’s a dark place you need to go, and you need to look at your motives, and some things that you’ve done, and some stuff that you have begged God, Oh God, please, please don’t let me get the consequences of that one. Oh God, pick me up, and cleanse me. And He has. And then what He’s going to say is, I want you to do for that person what I’ve done for you.

Forgiveness has three phases. Jot these down, please. Phase number one is a choice to forgive. It is not emotional. It has nothing to do with your feelings. It is a choice.

The second is the forgiving process. So you forgive, and then it’s forgiving. That’s a journey, and that journey is where your emotions catch up with the choice that you’ve made. Because you can forgive, and you do that, and you say…and the word means to release or to loose.

In other words, I’m going to take back my desire for them to get paid back, and I’m going to release them from that like God has released it. And so I’m not going to say anything negative about them, I’m not going to wish negative for them anymore. I’m going to release them to God, and I’m going to forgive them the way God has forgiven me: freely.

See, there’s poison in your soul when there’s bitterness and you’ve been wounded. And as someone wisely said, “When we refuse to forgive, it’s like we drink poison and think the other person is going to die.” Could I just make a comment? Because I think there’s a lot of confusion about forgiveness, and emotions, and, Well, I don’t feel like I’ve forgiven him.

Forgive is a choice, and then you bless them, you pray for them. We’re going to learn in a minute you not only pray for them, but you start doing good things for your actual enemies. Like if they’re hungry, you feed them. If they’re thirsty…and there are specific ways that you do good things for people who don’t deserve it.

But I’d like, if you would, to think about Jesus in the garden. He died to forgive you and to forgive me. And sometimes we make this: Jesus loves me, this I know. Can I let you in on a little secret? He didn’t feel like forgiving you. Did you ever think of that?

He’s in the garden, He’s sweating drops – the stress – blood coming out of His pores. And He’s fully God, but He’s fully man. He didn’t die with some “S” on His chest like, I’m going through the motions. As a man, He could die. But as God the Son, He knew that when He was going to get on that cross, your sin, and my sin, and the sin of all people of all time would be placed upon Him. He became our sin offering.

And when the moment sin came upon Him, the Father would turn away. And for the first time in eternity, the Father and the Son would be separated, and He would experience that isolation and the price of sin.

And do you remember what He prayed? “Father, let this cup pass.” You know what He’s saying? “I don’t want to do this. I don’t feel like doing this.”

Forgiving and loving isn’t doing what you feel like. It’s choosing to give another person what they need the most, when they deserve it the least, at great personal cost. And when God says to forgive this person, all we’re doing is we’re stepping in the same path of Jesus, and we’re doing for this person – they don’t deserve it – of course not. Neither did I. Neither did you. And so the process of forgiveness is a choice.

Second, forgive, Forgiving is a process. And then forgiven is: it’s done. And here’s how you know when it’s done. You can spontaneously rejoice at blessing in their life.

Some of you are going to get out of prison today. Some of you have been pushing this down, and that’s why you’re depressed. Some of you eat when you’re not hungry because you’ve been pushing this stuff down. Some of you have ulcers and migraines, and there are lots of physical causes, but a big part of why our bodies don’t work very well, and why we do stuff that doesn’t make sense, and we have “sanctified addictions,” and not so sanctified addictions. And a lot of it is rooted in this lack of forgiveness and be willing to release these people. And you can start that today.

The final thing he says, not only do you forgive them, but it talks about identification. And so it’s not just where you mentally are doing this. This gets from hard to crazy hard. He says, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.” Christians, we usually quote that, and we think it’s how we’re supposed to treat one another. You don’t need any commands to rejoice with people that you love, and you don’t need any commands to weep with people that you love that have cancer. The context here is this is how we bless or treat our enemies.

And so your boss who ripped you off, who did terrible things to you. Or your mate that walked out on you and married some little hottie, male or female, and now is on the beach while you don’t have any money, and you’re…now is this real stuff or not? Right? And then they get cancer, or they’re in an auto accident. You know what this says? You rejoice with those who rejoice, you weep with those who weep.

What would happen if you walked in that hospital room and said, “I know it’s been five years. You can’t believe how much I’ve prayed for you.” You don’t have to tell them why. “And I want you to know that I have forgiven you for what you’ve done. But when I heard about this cancer, I felt compelled by God to come tell you that Jesus really loves you, and I would love – would you allow me to pray for you right now?” Can you imagine them scratching their head?

Or when something good happens to them, rejoicing with them. Maybe they remarry. And they burnt you, but they have a kid, and they have a baby, and something happens, and you’ve completely forgiven them, and you’re praying for blessing.

What if you jotted a note and said, “I really, I praise God. I’ve been praying for your family for two years, and it’s exciting to see this blessing in your life.”

And for some, because here’s the disclaimer, if you were sexually abused, or this person hurt you or did something, there are some people you can’t get involved with. But you could send them an anonymous gift, because here’s what it does. It changes you.

And before you keep looking at me like this is the craziest stuff you’ve ever heard, isn’t this what Jesus did? Didn’t Jesus come to a planet, and those who were His own did not receive Him but rejected Him? So we are His enemies, Paul would call us, “while we were still His enemies, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8.

And so while we’re His enemies, what did He do? He went to weddings and rejoiced with us. He raised little kids from the dead. If you’re hungry, why don’t we just feed everybody right here? Or with Lazarus, what’d He do? He wept. See, Jesus wasn’t playing, Okay, when you clean up your act, and when everything gets okay, then I will love you. He rejoiced with those who were rejoicing, and He wept because it is the kindness of God that leads to repentance.

People will probably, this is so counterintuitive. This is so bizarre. When you, by His power and His grace, choose to do this, something happens, and the grace of God works through you in ways where you know what? People start to believe, Maybe this Jesus is real.

And so it begins with forgiveness. And then there’s identification. And then notice the very last part, verse 16. He says there’s an association that you need to be very careful. He says, “Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing” – circle that word associate – “with people of low position.” And then as though, “Do not be conceited.”

In a fallen world, with evil people, and especially those who don’t know Christ and are very antagonistic, the apostle Paul is saying, “We need to be people who don’t just cling to our rights. In the fray of life, it’s a selfish dog-eat-dog, manipulative world. Welcome to the NFL! So how does a Christian live that out?

If possible, He says, “Live in harmony with one another.” And then here’s the deal. When you’re blessing your enemies, see, if you’re not careful, it can be like, You know what? I’m going to do this. I’m going to jot a card. I’m going to visit them in the hospital. I’m going to pray for them every day. You know what? I’m this wonderful, spiritual, amazing person, loving this scumbag of the world, who walked out on me. That’s kind of the opposite of “do not be conceited.”

See, this is hard for some of us. On a given day, the very thing that that person did to you in a moment of weakness and under pressure, you could do that to someone else.

So we come not as the superiors. We come associating with, connecting with our humanity, people of low position. And we’re not conceited, but it’s with humility that we bless them with a sense of, But for the grace of God, I would be doing those things to others.

Doesn’t this really just sound like Jesus? Doesn’t it just, isn’t there a trail being blazed that we’re to follow? And so that’s the positive side. “Bless those” – and notice – “who persecute you.” They’re after you.

The second command is a negative one: “Don’t take your own revenge,” verses 17 through 20. “Don’t take your own revenge.” It’s just a command. “Do not repay evil for evil.” And then – he’s in a fallen world. He says, “Be careful.” Circle that word above it. Literally, it’s take thought. The New American Standard says, “Respect what is right in the sight of all men. “If possible, as far as it depends on you, live with peace with everyone.”

And then he goes on to say, Just wait a second. “Don’t take your own revenge, but leave room for God’s wrath. He’s the one who’s going to be the judge. He’s going to mete out justice.” But here’s the point. Personal retaliation is a prohibited response for God’s people. Personal retaliation.

In other words, they did evil to you, you get them back. They did evil to you, you get them back. They did this to you, you say bad things about them. And if you’re a Christian, and you have some experience, you can do it in such passive aggressive ways, and you add a verse to it. Throw in, “It’s a prayer request.” It works, believe me.

And you just go left-handed like this, and you whack them, because your real goal is revenge. It’s payback. You use your power, you use your intellect, you use your relationships, you use nuances, and you go like this, “One more drink of poison, please. It’s going to kill him sooner or later.” But it doesn’t. “Never pay back evil for evil.”

Instead, take thought and consider how people think, respect and realize that they don’t have your values, they’re not going to act the same way, so the field is not level. They’re really focused on them.

Sometimes I hear Christians get all upset about non-Christians living like non-Christians. That guy is really greedy! She is so sexually immoral! I can’t believe that! He just drained the whole company and all the employees! Oh my! So what were we like before Jesus was controlling the interior of our lives? Take thought for how people think. It will help you live in harmony with them.

Personal retaliation is prohibited for two very important reasons. One, it usurps God’s role as judge. “Vengeance is Mine.” God says, Look, I’m just. Yes, I’m holy, I’m compassionate, I’m slow to anger, but I’m just. And the word justice is rooted in a concept. The scales of justice. Justice is rooted in a very clear concept of retribution. Retribution is simply this: When you do evil stuff – evil consequences. When you do good stuff – reward. Every man will get what they deserve.

So you just need to say, I need to take the ball of judgment, hand it to God, and say, I’m tired of trying to figure out all the ways – in my anger fantasies and different ways – to get back at my boss, or my ex, or one of my kids, or the person who abused me. And I’m going to put that ball in Your hands from now throughout eternity, and I’m going to trust that since You are just that You will do what’s right. I will never get a raw deal. But I’m stepping out. You own it, God. I release it to You. You’re fair, You’re just. And either on this side of heaven, or on this side of after death, the scales will be absolutely and perfectly balanced.

[Sigh] You can release that wound, and that hurt, and your desire for payback, because He knows all things. He knows all the whys. He knows all the circumstances, and you don’t, and you can give that to Him. But there are a lot of us, if you demand to be the judge, then God doesn’t get to be the judge. And when you judge people, and you decide you’re going to pay them back, you reap what you sow.